Writer's Workshop: Working in a Barrel of Monkeys

I know lots of people are braving cold temps and trudging through the snow and ice to get to work these days. Many of them are probably wishing they could just work from home.

Let me just say, some days I'd rather brave the weather than weather the storm here at home -- let alone try to get any work done in the midst of it!

It's not unusual for me to have to break up a fist fight, fish a child off a the top of a table or out of a cabine, take someone to the potty, or serve a meal all while I'm working from home.

I'm very efficient, and I can get a LOT done during naptime and after the kids go to bed, but sometimes I have to take a business call while the kids are up and active. I always explain the situation, and people are very understanding and accommodating, but still, it's mildly insane to juggle things on my end.
Thank heavens for the mute button on my cell phone. It saves those I'm talking to from the insane noise levels we can reach around here.

Despite the mute button, I'm almost certain that yesterday a client heard me ask "Where is your diaper?" before my call was completely disconnected.

Thankfully he wasn't still on the line for the "I was poopy," response that followed. That sent me on a four-room hunt for the phantom poopies. I didn't find anything, and I think that the perpetrator only tried to poop, but failed.

Oh well, if I'm wrong about that I'll find out sooner rather than later.

Today I had the misfortune of being on a dying cell phone. In order to finish my business I had to plug it into the wall. About that time the triplets pushed down the baby gate keeping them out of the kitchen and the bedrooms.

Note to self: Pressure gates were not made to contain triplets.

This is exactly the situation for which the phrase "run amok" was created. Exactly.

Those boys ran screaming through the house as fast as they could go. Almost everything was closed up, so I knew they couldn't harm themselves, but I shuddered at the thought of the damage they could do.

It took me seven minutes to finish my call. It took me an hour to clean up after the boys. F3 tornado, anyone?

To make matters worse, the boys knew they had me over a barrel. They would come running into the kitchen shouting and grinning at me and then turn and run away with a you-can't-catch-me look on their faces. That spells trouble, doesn't it? Whatever did moms do before cordless phones and cell phones? 

So to all you rush hour warriors out there, know that your commute may be bad, especially in this winter weather, but working from home ain't always what it's cracked up to be.

At least not when all three of your colleagues are two years old.

My little helpers: Isaac, Sam and Alex

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