Sunday Morning Mommy Guilt

On Sunday morning I was rushing, again, to get Amelia to Sunday school on time. One of these weeks I'm going to get the Sunday morning routine figured out.

Anyway, Amelia and I were almost to the church when she started talking about milk and how much she loved milk. In fact, she told me that she loved it so much she wanted to have a house full of milk so she could drink it all up with a straw.

And that's when I realized I had rushed her out the door with no breakfast. No banana, no granola bar, not even a lousy cup of milk for the car.

Uh oh.

Amelia kept chattering about milk and I held my breath as we pulled into the parking lot. I was just waiting for her to ask me for her milk, and bracing for the meltdown that was likely to ensue.

I hustled her out of the car and to her classroom, partly so she wouldn't be late, and partly because I was hoping she wouldn't realize her mommy forgot to give her anything to eat or drink that morning.

After Mass I took Amelia to the church hall to buy her a doughnut and milk, something we've never done before. As we stood in line with our goodies she piped up, "Mom, are these for the kids who didn't get breakfast?"

Ouch. Nothing like a good dose of Mommy guilt to get your week off to a great start, is there?

© Trippin' Mama 2010

Amelia's Questions: The Church Edition

This morning I took Amelia to church with me. And, wow, did she ever have questions! It was like she'd never been in church before.

I came home and told Jeff that my brain hurt.

Here's a small sampling of the game of 4,382 questions we played in church this morning.

"What are those gray things?" (The organ pipes.)

"How do they make noise?" (Air travels through them when that man presses the keys. I think.)

"Why are some big and some little?" (OK, that was a good question. Big=low sound. Small=high sound.)

"Why?" (Too hard to explain in church. Ask me later. And she will, too.)

"Is that the priest?" (Thanks for the easy one. Yes.)

"Why is he wearing a green dress?" (It's not a dress, those are called vestments. It's like his uniform.)

"Why are they green?" (How do I explain ordinary time in the liturgical calendar to a four year old?)

"Why does he have two helpers?" (Because he needs two.)

"Why is one a girl and one a boy?" (Because that's who showed up to help today.)

"Is that lady a priest, too?" (Hoo boy! Whole can of religious worms there. Let's just settle for no.)

"What is she?" (She's a lector, which is a big word for the person who reads us a story.)

"Is she going to sing?" (No, she's going to read us a story.)

"Is this lady going to sing?" (Another easy one. Yes.)

"Is this lady a priest? There sure are a lot of ladies here." (No, she's not a priest, and yes, there are.)

"Why is he holding up that book?" (That's the Bible, and it's very important so he wants us all to see it.)

By this point in the Mass it was time to ask why Mommy had a headache, and we weren't even half done.

We covered the collection, why the priest raises his hands, why we kneel, why some people hold hands during the prayer and some don't, who gets to go to the front of the church for communion, why some people need a drink (Sacramental wine, people! Stay with me here.) and some don't, why the piano sounds different than the organ, who was in the picture at the front of the church, why the stained glass made the light different colors, why there were banners and a couple hundred additional topics.

I think I got about half of the answers right.

Anyone want to take a beautiful, curious, precocious four-year-old girl to church next Sunday? She comes with a free bottle of Extra-Strength Tylenol.

© Trippin' Mama 2010

Amelia's Adventure Ends

Our week of Vacation Bible School is over.

I think Amelia is equal parts glad and sad that she's done. She had fun, but it was different for her to be with a big group of kids, and I think she found it overwhelming at times.

I'm just grateful to have survived all of the loading and unloading that went with dropping Amelia off at 9 a.m. and picking her up noon. It has confirmed for me that we will not be doing half-day kindergarten. It's all or nothing, baby. Otherwise it's too much work for the mama, and the boys have to spend too much time in the van every day.

But I digress.

Jeff and I went to Amelia's Bible School program on Friday. It was classic, of course. Some kids waved at their parents, some picked their noses, some goofed around with their hats. Ours did all three.

Amelia also did a great job with the words and the motions. They had wonderful volunteer teachers who taught them a lot in a short time. I am amazed by anyone who can get this much out of four and five year olds in less than five hours.

Check their hard work out for yourself. Amelia's in the front row in the orange hat.

© Trippin' Mama 2010

Thar She Blows!

Way back in April I took Amelia with me to sign her up for Vacation Bible School this summer. She was so excited to go. And so very disappointed that it wasn't the next day. Or the day after that. Or the day after that.

I finally told her that Vacation Bible School would happen after her birthday. That forestalled the "Is it today?" question for about a month.

Well today was finally the day. Amelia was excited about going. We walked in to see a big ship and mermaids decorating the school gym. We saw the volunteers setting out the day's snack. We got all the way to her classroom before Amelia decided that maybe she didn't really want to be there.

I introduced her to another little girl in her class and Amelia wouldn't even say hello. I knew then that I was in real trouble. Fortunately I didn't have the boys in tow. I convinced Jeff that it would be much better for me to do the first drop off sans boy-os so I could scope things out.

Turns out that was a particularly good idea, as I left Amelia wailing in the arms of one of the preschool helpers. I figured by the time the boys and I picked her up at noon she probably wouldn't want to leave.

Amelia was ready to go, but excitedly told me all about her day.

Everything was great until I said something about what she'd be doing tomorrow.

"I'm not going back tomorrow!" she wailed. Then tonight as I was putting her in bed she asked if she was going to Vacation Bible School because she's a big girl. I told her yes, now that she's four she gets to go.

"Can't I wait until I'm five?" she asked. I felt a little sorry for her, being tossed into the big girl world already.

Then she asked if I thought the mermaids would still be there. Because she likes mermaids.

So, who knows which way the wind will blow tomorrow?

Cross your fingers for us, because I'll be dragging the whole crew along for drop off. And hopefully the crabby mom who complained at pickup time that my triple stroller was "taking up too much room" in the hallway will be feeling a bit more Christian tomorrow.

© Trippin' Mama 2010

Picture This: The Reality

Well, the photo session for the church directory went pretty much as I predicted.

The day started out wonderfully, with all three boys sleeping in until 7 a.m. Of course, their timing was terrible, as late wakeup meant late nap and I needed to keep things moving. But church directory be darned, I was NOT waking them up. I've had enough of 5:30 a.m. wakeup calls to last me a lifetime.

In order to make our 12:10 appointment on time, we had to start lunch at 10:30. So I'm waking babies up and strapping them in their high chairs half asleep so they can eat before we go. And Amelia's still in her pjs so we don't have to worry about her spilling lunch on her photo clothes.

So there we all are at 10:30 a.m.: Three semi-awake boys who are being force fed, a three-year-old who just finished breakfast and is now lunching in her pjs, and two adults who suddenly realized they are at T-90 minutes and counting and are running around like crazy people.

We're throwing things in the car, packing the diaper bag, loading the stroller, making bottles for later, and I grab the clean shirt I'm planning to wear. It came straight out of the laundry basket, and it was still dirty.

Seriously? Could I get a break over here?

I spot the stain, chuck the shirt in the washer with the ever-present load of clothes, and rush back upstairs to continue the force feeding. About halfway through the meal, the boys wake up and decide they are HUNGRY. They eat and eat and eat, and I begin to realize I'm going to have to cut them off if we are going to make it to the church on time.

(Cue music here. "Get me to the church on time...")

By now it's 11:30 and we have 15 minutes to load everyone up to make our 12:10 time slot. And by God, I am NOT rescheduling and going through this again!

So with 15 minutes until wheels up, we've got three boys covered in lunch, a child still in her pjs, my shirt has just been transferred to the dryer, and Jeff still has to get dressed, too.

Am I the queen of good planning or what?

I start diapering at lightning speed and tossing clothes on the boys, then handing them off to Jeff to strap in the car without even fastening the bottoms of their shorts outfits.

Sam has smeared food in his hair and my attempts to get his hair clean leave him looking like a koala bear -- flat on top with curls springing out on both sides over his ears.

Oh, what the heck. He'll probably never see this photo anyway. And he looks better than Isaac, whose cowlicks completely defy description.

We're almost ready to roll when I turn around and realize Amelia is till in her jammies. I hastily shove her into her clothes and run her out to the van sans shoes, then sprint to the dryer to retrieve my shirt. It's still damp.

Necessity trumping reason, I put it on anyway, even though the color clearly shows that it's partly wet. It will dry by the time we get there, surely.

We screech out of the driveway a couple minutes late and head for the church. Park, load the boys in the stroller, and try not to look too harried as we run into the parish hall.

That's little tough to pull off when your children are half dressed and you're wearing a damp shirt. But I mentally adjusted my tiara and went with the illusion.

Our time slot was only 15 minutes long. Sam was pulling hair. Alex was trying to crawl away. Isaac kept standing up. Amelia was crying. Jeff and I were smiling through gritted teeth. And the photographer kept saying, "Great!" "Perfect!"

Bartender, I'll have what he's having.

The guy enthusiastically took 11 pictures. And reviewed the digital images. He was thrilled with his results. So you'd think we'd have choices.

You'd be wrong.

The sales guy goes slowly through each photo as if it's hard to choose. Hmmm, that photo has three screaming kids in it and I look like my head's about to start spinning ala The Exorcist. Really. You can move on without giving us five minutes to ponder.

Photo 10 out of 11 turns out to be our only hope. No one is screaming. The tears on Amelia's face are not apparent. Jeff and I don't look like we want to abandon the children then and there. Someone might even have been smiling.

We make the choice and prepare to run off even as the sales guy is trying to show us the last photo with a different background in case we want to buy extras. Jeff's eyes are partially closed, making him look drunk (which would be perfectly understandable) and I'm clearly hissing at the kids, none of whom are looking at the camera or smiling.

I'm sure it's only a matter of time before that treasure finds its way to http://www.awkwardfamilyphotos.com/.

Ah well, at least our photo shouldn't scare our fellow parishioners away. It may even garner us some sympathy and an extra prayer or two. And we'll take all the help we can get.

Picture This!

So yesterday I got a reminder phone call that tomorrow we are having our picture taken for the church directory.

It's written right there on my calendar, but I completely forgot about it. Of course, I had to schedule it nearly three months ago, so it's no surprise that I forgot.

I instantly panicked about what the kids are going to wear and wondered why I thought 12:10 p.m. was a good time when we are usually just cleaning up from lunch then.

And then I realized that it won't matter what they are wearing or that the boys had lunch at 10:30 a.m., when they are usually just getting up from their nap. The photo sessions are scheduled in 15-minute increments, and there's NO WAY they will be able to get a decent picture of all of us in that amount of time.

Maybe we'll snap a real winner that we can submit here: http://awkwardfamilyphotos.com/

I foresee us mulling over which shot makes our children and us look less demonic. The one where half of the children are screaming their heads off? Or the one where the parents look like they would gladly abandon the children on the rectory doorstep at any second?

I suspect no one will notice what we're wearing.

Instead they'll be studying the picture so they can make sure they never end up sitting next to us in church.

More Stories From Church

Last week when we went to church, there were two groups of nuns there in full habit. When I took Amelia to the bathroom before church, one of the sisters was washing her hands. Amelia, of course, asked, "What's that?"

I realized that she probably had never seen a nun before, so I told her to say, "Good morning, Sister." And then I explained that nuns were like girl priests. Yes, I know it's not exactly accurate, but she's three and she could understand that.

Amelia didn't say much, but you could see the wheels turning.

As it happened, we had one group of sisters two rows sitting behind us and one group sitting two rows ahead of us. So Amelia spent a lot of the service checking them out.

After church was over we were buckling the boys into their car seats and one of the nuns sitting behind us leaned forward to ask, "Are they triplets?" We had a short conversation and she said they would pray for us. Alleluia! We can use all the help we can get!

The nuns all knelt down to pray for a few minutes and as we left, Amelia piped up.

"Mom, are the angels going to stay here?"

Angels. Nuns. She probably got it right after all.

Another Church Conversation with Amelia

Today Amelia and I had this conversation in church.

Amelia: (Pointing to the lector) "What is that man doing?"

Me: "He's reading a story from the Bible."

A: "The Bible?"

M: "Remember? That's the book about God and Jesus."

A: "Mama, who is God?"

M: "He is Jesus's daddy."

About this time, the priest came to the lectern. Amelia said, "Is that God?"

"No," I replied. "That's the priest. He's the leader at church."

"The leader?" said Amelia. "Does that mean he gets to lead the Pledge of Allegiance?"

Amelia's Big Day

Today Amelia went to the zoo with Mom & Dad while Grandpa D. watched the boys. It was a little chilly out, but we had a great time. I think the last time we went was last summer when I was about 30 weeks pregnant with the boys. It was much easier to get around this time!

Amelia & Daddy together at the zoo.

The dolphin show is always a favorite, as are the penguins. Today we also saw the lions pretty close, and a rooster that was crowing. Amelia did NOT like the rooster. She was scared and wanted to leave as fast as possible. As we went from one exhibit to the next, Amelia kept saying, "I want to see more animals." I think we saw almost all of them!

After her nap, Amelia got to color with her new markers. She colored the Christmas ornament that Grandma Alice and Grandpa Ernie gave her. I'm sure it isn't intentional that it looks like this little house is on fire.

Amelia's Christmas ornament, March 2009. Almost 3 years old.

Then we all got ready to go to church. Amelia looked so cute in her dress that Grandma D. and Aunt Allie picked out. She refused to wear the little sweater that came with it, but I did talk her into tights. When Jeff saw this picture all he could say was, "I'm in so much trouble." Yes, he is. And so am I!

Amelia strikes a pose in her new dress. Thanks, Grandma D. & Aunt Allie!

This was the first time we took the boys to church other than for their baptismal ceremony. They were so good! Isaac fussed a little on his way to sleep, and Sam fussed a little before church started, but all three slept almost the entire time. I think they were trying to lull us into a false sense of security. I still haven't figured out how we can take all four kids without a third set of hands, but it was nice to all go to church as a family.

Sam, Isaac, Alex and Amelia.

Grandpa D., Alex, Jeff, Isaac, Amelia and Sam.

When Grandpa D. was on the phone with Grandma D. tonight talking about his flight home tomorrow, I was in the background shouting, "You can't have him back!" It's always so nice to have family visit, and the boys are growing so fast that they are like whole new kids if you haven't seen them in a couple of months.

We'll have more family visiting soon. We're looking forward to seeing Allie at the end of the month and Susie in May. They'll be amazed at how things have changed around here!

Conferral of Rites

Since we had the boys baptized in the hospital, we took them to the church for Conferral of Rites. They were anointed with chrism (holy oil), received their baptismal candles and were welcomed as members of the church. We were thrilled to share the big day with so many of our friends and neighbors who have helped us with the boys.

I'm still reveling in the smell of chrism on their little heads. Here are photos from the big day. Enjoy!

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