Thursday, May 6, 2010

Mommy Guilt Begone


Tonight was my monthly Moms' Night Out. MNOs are sacrosanct in my house. Because sometimes mama just needs a break.

Jeff is probably almost as committed to getting me out of the house as I am. Thankfully he is very understanding about how important it is for me to go out and socialize and not be mom for a while. (Even if we mostly talk about our kids!)

Tonight when I left Jeff was holding two crying children: Isaac and Amelia. Even though Isaac tends to be a bit of a mama's boy, his real problem was that he was tired and just needed to go to bed. Amelia, though, took my departure very hard tonight. 

She and I talked about my going out tonight in the car on the way home from preschool. She told me she didn't want me to go. I told her that she got to go to preschool and see her friends, and mommy needed to go see her friends sometimes, too. Amelia seemed to accept that and be OK with it.

Apparently after I left Amelia cried a bit, got over it, but then really melted down on Jeff later.

My gift to myself is not to feel guilty about that. Amelia is four. She will never remember this. She will probably be over it by tomorrow morning.

I refuse to even feel guilty that Jeff had a rough time dealing with her. He's 38. He can handle it.

Because you know what? This mom gig is tough enough without carrying around a load of mommy guilt all the time.

So I'm choosing to leave that burden by the side of the road tonight. I'm sure this won't be the last time I have to deliberately set down my mommy guilt and walk away from it.

But it would be a good habit to get into.


© Trippin' Mama 2010

3 comments:

AJ said...

Sounds like a good idea to me! Ejnoy your nights out!

Mary said...

Someday when Amelia is a mom you can remind her... I bet in your day you made mom feel guilty (or not) about leaving a time or two as well, I know I did! Time for you makes you a better mom- something they will only understand when they are a mom or dad!

Stacia said...

Nope, she won't remember it, and you'll be be a better mommy for taking your me-time. Hope you had a great night out!